Question

A Winter’s Tale.

The challenge is to write a short story of 250 words on an aspect of winter. No horror, nothing Christmassy and no poetry, but remember; "a sad tale's best for winter"!  The winner will be selected on Monday 5^th December, which gives everyone two weekends to get their writing skates on. Good luck and most of all, enjoy your writing!

Saxon

Comments

Two very sad stories and as Shakespear said, a sad tale is best for winter!

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Sorry for the late response, BTW. :)

Answer 1

Where's my mama? I heard a big bang that scared me, and now I can't find her. The blinding white snow is all around me, and I can't find my mama. It's cold, and my fur doesn't do enough to keep me warm. Nothing like curling up with mama in our cave. The snow is cold as I wander out in search of my mama's scent. The wind was blowing it all over though, and the snow didn't hold it for long. It stuck to my wet nose, tickling and making me sneeze. It was sticking in my fur now, melting and making me shiver. I call out for my mama, roaring feebly until my throat goes raspy. I couldn't find her anywhere. I turn around to try and find my warm cave, but I can't see it anymore. Where do I go now?

* * *

A mile down the way, a hunter was adjusting his bright orange cap. His rifle was slung over his right shoulder, the steel still warm with smoke spewing out of the muzzle. He stood beside his fresh kill, the hot blood pouring out of the bullet wound in the brown bear's neck. It was roaming too close to town at too strange of a season to feel safe for him and his family, so he had gone to the sheriff for permission to hunt it down and put it out of it's misery. Now, his family and friends would be safe for another winter.

 

Comments

Like this, but it is 104 words short!

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Oh my gosh, I read the challenge wrong! It's about 2:30am here, and I thought it said 250 words max! Back to the writing board with me to improve it! Thank you!

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That should be 250, but I have to count by hand so I'm not completely sure!

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Nice story. I'm thinking what I should write for this...

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Wow, I didn't think it would be bears at the end! Very nice story. Sad, but it really showed the two perspectives very nicely.

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I think the double story is better than the original. Very nicely done. The last but one line has it’s; in my world it should be its, but I know we sometimes have variations of “English”.

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No, you may be right. That has always confused me in terms of showing possession. I'm American, so that's what I use.

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Oh! You almost made me cry! Poor cub! I can console myself by knowing it's not set in Canada, at least... the hunter never would have been given permission to kill out of season here...

Regarding "it's" vs. "its" - the rule is, if you can replace it with "it is" or "it has" then use "it's". Otherwise use "its". This is one of the very few "rules" of English grammar that will never fail you. "It" is the neuter version of third person singular, like "he" or "she". For possessive, we don't say "he's" or "she's", we say "his" and "hers". No apostrophe. The same goes for "it" - for possessive, we use "its". I know, I know, this doesn't match any of the other possessive nouns, but English IS a very silly language. I read once that the "rules" only apply about 40% of the time. The rest you just have to "know". I promise that I'm not a "grammar Nazi", but I do have a pretty solid undrstanding of the "rules" of English grammar... so if you're ever in doubt, feel free to ask. :-)

Answer 2

My   Friend

My name is Kala and my best friend moved last Christmas. I am very sad because no one will play with me. I sent letters to her and phoned her but she didn’t answer. I miss her because she always played with me and her name is Marie. I miss Marie and her family too. We always studied and played at school. We made snow angels and a snowman. We always reviewed at school because we wanted to be perfect at our homework at school. Then I heard in the news on TV that Marie’s dad died because her dad was stuck in a snow storm. I was very sad for my best friend Marie. Then I sent a letter to her.

To: Marie

I am very sad for you and your dad. We all miss you Marie.

From: Kala

Then eight years passed and I heard that Marie’s mom died from cancer in the winter. Then I phoned her on number 555-4654 and said that I am very sad for her and her mom. Then one day passed and I heard that her dog died. I was very sad for her. Then when both of us were adult we got our own sons, but not for long. They both died. We buried them in sand holes. Then finally my best friend got home, but not for long. My best friend died from cancer too like her mom. I was crying the whole day. I am very sad.

Comments

Note from Ms. D.:
Once again, this response was written by just one of my students. He is eight years old and new to Canada. He loves writing and writes at home all the time!

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A very nice story and so sad.

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hi ms D i think what you think of the story

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Nice story, whoever wrote this. Well done, especially from an eight year old. I felt like crying there! Very sad.

Answer 3

once there was a ltitle boy who had a pet turtle and the little boy was walking to school with his pet turtle then when it was time to line up and go to class before the teacher came to grab us the little boy put his pet turtle in his back pack  but the line started moving before he could  zip the backpack up so  he put  the pack back on his back  and started following the line but the turtle fell out of the backpack on to the ground and then an hour later the turtle was frozen  and then at recess time the little boy went to go and check on the turtle and he couldnt find the little turtle and he felt like he was going to cry  and he went to his desk  and put his head down and started crying the boy was so sad that all he would think of is his turtle and wear would  he be did someone steal him from my backpack or did he fall out and land on the ground so the little boy went to line up and well he was walking he was making sure he wasnt  on the class room floor and he found nothing so he ask his friend to help him find his turtle but then there  was annoucment and it said indoor recess and the little boy said never mind  and his friend said ok maybe next recess the little boy said ok the end

 

Comments

I am very sorry, but I agree with what Spots said. I think you are too young for this website yet. Maybe you could go to school and keep practicing and learn to improve your writing. You also need to learn to use capital letters and full stops.

Thank you,
Cherry ;)

Answer 4

Are You Happy Now?

Terry opened her locker to find a note fall out. She opened it. 

'Freak.'  

She looked behind her where the group of girls were sitting and laughing. She felt a tear drip down her face. She quickly crumpled up the note and threw it and walked away. The girls carried on laughing. "What a geek!" one of them giggled.

Terry ran home and opened her laptop to find an email link to a "hot or not" website. She opened it and there was a picture of her compared to a girl from the group of girls. Her name was Chelsea. The note beneath Chelsea's picture said "hot" and the note below Terry's name said "so not." Terry closed the laptop and ran into the bathroom to find her make up smudged and then ran on to her bed until she noticed her mascara smudged over the cusion her grandma made her for Christmas.  

The next day at school she found another note saying:
'haha such a geek! no wonder no one likes you'
Terry walked right up to them, about to shout to them, when she got scared. The girls just laughed at her. Terry walked up to the other girls until they walked away too. Terry stood, by her locker all by herself, with nothing but pain. 

"She's so annoying! Follows people around!" Terry heard them say after period 3.
"Yaa I wish she just left here away from our lives," the other girl said.
'What did I ever do to them, to be getting all this hatred! I don't follow them around, I'm not annoying. Why does no one like me? I'm pretty, good at math...then why?' Terry ran into the girls toilet when she saw the other half of the group doing their make up. When they saw Terry crying with her make up smudged, they burst out laughing. Terry ran into the cubicals and got her phone out and saw a message from a boy called Brenden in her Media Studies class. It said "Hot or Not? You're so NOT :-)' She ran out where there was a big crowd round her. Her bag and phone fell to the floor. Everyone peered round, nosily. She picked her things up and walked  out the school out into the cold darkness. 

She suddenly got a phone call. It was from Megan, her best friend who had moved to America last year, and since then Terry had no one and she got bullied. Terry didn't bother getting her phone out. She ran out on to the road. And...

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"I will never ever forgive all you girls for what you did to my only daughter! She was my only hope. NEVER. Do you even know the feeling a mother feels after she finds out her child is no more?"

The girls shook their heads, ashamed.

"My 15 year old daughter, I lost!" Terry's mother took out Terry's phone and showed them something:

"Yaa I wish she just left here away from our lives,"

The girls looked at Chloe, who was ashamed of herself, for saying that. 

"...until it came true!" said the mother. "When you said that, did you really wish my daughter was dead?!" 

The girls shook their heads, embarassed.

There was sudden silence

Suddenly, there were footsteps. The girls looked up to find.... Megan! "Are you happy now?"

Comments

Hey Cherry!! You haven't been on very much lately; it's great to read something new from you! :)
I liked this a lot. I think that stories like this are very relevant right now, and you did a great job showing the torture that some people go through in school. I was bullied in school as well, so I really identified with the Terry character.
Very good, and glad to have you back!

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LOL. I really appreciate someone missed me!! ;) And I got bullied too. That sort of stuff stopped now but there's still people who are not very nice...:(
Yesterday I was feeling very upset about it, I actually cried so I wrote the story to get it off my mind...I have some editing to do !!
Thanks! I am hopefully back!

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Two weeks too late, double the word count and not very wintery... other than that, not bad!

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I know. I said sorry it was late. And I did try shortening it, but that's as far as I could get to. And I also know it's not very wintery but ... I spent a lot of time putting this emotional story together so.... I am quite... disappointed with your comment... :( but, you know. Everyone has different opinions, but still...

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BTW, you know how you're saying this is not very wintery?? Well, the story by Room122 wasn't very wintery either. I am not really comparing, and I know it's only a 3rd grader or something but still...