Thinkwrite Challenge LXXV

Question

Please use the following 10 words to create a short story. Due date is August 15. Word limit is 400-500.

Mystery                                                  Cyprus

Storm                                                   Echoes

Intelligence                                         Passage

Animosity                                            Adrenaline

Fauna                                                 Surface

Comments

is TW continuing...?  :(

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Good question. I just sent a PM to 7dutch7 and hopefully he/she will see it.
If not, as a moderator, I can choose the best response and get this moving again. If I forget to check (I've been quite busy lately), pm me a reminder.

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Hi everyone.
I've been asked recently by a teacher if they could use this site for a class project - make a challenge where the whole class would choose the words, read all the stories and pick the winner. I think it's a wonderful idea. Since this challenge chain has been stuck for a while, having a few fresh minds involved could be the perfect opportunity to jump-start it back to life. I already talked it over with WON as the last active participant in TWC LXXV and he agreed to it. So, expect a new challenge soon. =D

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I think its a great idea!!  :D  Can't wait to see how it goes!  I will most definitely be participating if at all possible. :)

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I'm so excited to see what Room122 does for the next ThinkWrite Challenge! =D

Answer 1

Courage

Tonight is the night: I'm going to win the bet. I'm such a coward most of the time that my friend Alex dared me to walk home after the storm today. According to the forecast, "It could be near flooding when the rain stops for the day." The weatherman was wrong, though-- the rain left merely a blanket over the ground.

Alex, always full of intellegence, came to America last year as an exchange student from an island called Cyprus. At first, I felt strong animosity toward him, because I thought he was cocky and rude. But now, he's my best friend. Therefore he knows about my worst fear of forests, which is mainly why we made this bet.

To get home, though, I have to walk through a forest. Usually, this wouldn't be my route of choice, but it's the only way. I walk through the small passage of twisted trees and fallen branches to get into the forest. As I trek through, my sneakers sopping wet with mud, I notice something in the distance. I stop where I'm standing, tilting my head a little to try to identify this mystery creature. At first I thought it was just a tree, but now that I can see better, it's more of a human shape. My adrenaline starts to kick in once I realize I'm being watched.

I'd finally decided to ignore the person watching me, brushing it off as my overactive imagination that kicks in when I'm scared. Instead of acknowledging it at all, I observed some of nature’s fauna. A colony of ants march in a long row, carrying a small crumb on each of their backs. I envy them; they have nothing to worry about other than being stepped on. And right now, they didn’t even have to worry about that, since I’m the only one in the forest, I think to myself, once again ignoring the person across the forest.

After a while of just standing here, I take a step forward. The mud inside of my shoes swishes around and makes a small, barely noticeable noise. At least I hope it was barely noticeable.

If there’s anything that I learned from watching horror movies, don’t let your fear surface. If it shows, you’re in for major trouble; the tormentor will just try to scare you even more if they know you’re afraid. Sadly, this is the part I fail at.

Trying as hard as I can to not be afraid, I push myself to run the whole way through the rest of the forest. The sound of my footsteps crunching twigs and fallen leaves echoes throughout the whole area, leaving behind only my footprints in the mud and the strange creature that once watched

Comments

o.O - this is awesome. I love that you never reveal whether the person is actually real or just a figment of the character's imagination.
Oh, and welcome to ThinkWrite! =)

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Nice. Very creepy. :-)

I like that you chose to write in present tense. It brings the reader into the scene and adds to the suspense. You slipped into past tense, though, a few times in the fourth and fifth paragraph. It would read more smoothly if you kept the tense consistent through the present action portions of the story.

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Very nice work. Welcome to thinkwrite. I'm going to have to study on the two entries before making a decision. Both are very good.

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Since 7dutch7 seems to be away and the challenge was supposed to end over five weeks ago, I chose the best response, so that the ThinkWrite challenges can continue. My only criteria was the number of votes and this story had the most. Congrats brokenglasspanda, you are now the "torchbearer". That means you get to start the next challenge. Click on "Set a Challenge", put "ThinkWrite Challenge LXXVI" as the title and add the description. You should make a list of 10 words and set a deadline. If you want any additional criteria (e.g. a specific genre), you can add that as well. Also, please add "thinkwrite" as one of the tags, it makes it easier to find later.
Sorry if I'm telling you things you already know, I just saw you hadn't started any challenges yet, so I don't know how well you get around.
If you need any help, pm me. :)
Also, if you don't have the time or the will to make a challenge and you want someone else to do it, please say so, so that we don't have to wait in vain!

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I see that this response was chosen as the best when I was away, and I do agree. The pen is passed. Nice work . Sorry for the leave of absence.

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Hey brokenglasspanda. You've been away for a while, so I selected another torchbearer to get the challenges going again. Your response still had the most comments and was the challengesetter's choice.

Answer 2

// 497 words, including title

Snap

Adrenaline made my heart beat so loud I was sure people could hear the echoes of it throughout my reading of the passage, even over the sound of the summer thunder storm outside. They all looked up at me expectantly; I was supposed to have something intelligent to say. But my intelligence was lacking these days. When school ended I started to let my smarts give way to the meaningless thoughts that summer brings. On the surface, of course, I was as gifted as ever. My parents didn’t pay for my enrollment in this summer class every year regardless of my school marks just to see me fail it. I would always pass in the end; I tried hard. But that didn’t mean I tried as hard as they wished I would.

The animosity I felt towards my parents was probably unnecessary. I just didn’t understand, yet. I would, soon, when I was older and wiser. That’s what they kept saying to me, “When you have kids, you’ll understand why we were so strict about school.” “Maybe so,” I would say, “but right now, I wish I could just stay home like all other kids.”

Other kids weren’t studying the flora and fauna of South American Rainforests, the temperature and population in the country of Cyprus. Other kids weren’t forced into taking summer school, unless they failed a course or wanted a better grade. I already consistently got the best grades I could achieve. Why it wasn’t enough for my parents is still a mystery to me.

I stared back into the eyes of my classmates easily. As my heart beat returned to its regular rhythm, I took a breath and the class watched. They all knew I didn’t have to be here. I had all of their sympathy and pity. That isn’t what I wanted, though.

I knew that they were all expecting the deepest analysis that was possible. I was the smart one; the one who was there for fun. As I anticipated, the teacher nodded at me to continue. A few kids sat up straighter in their chairs. I could almost hear their thoughts in my mind, ‘is he stopping on purpose?’, ‘he only has another two minutes to make his point,’ and so on. Their wishful thinking that maybe, just this once, the smart kid would mess up.

Well, they wouldn’t get what they wanted. At least not right now. I would give the most impressive scrutiny of the reading they had ever seen, for now. But tomorrow, the teacher, my classmates, my parents and probably the police would all think that stress had made me snap, go crazy, and mess up bad. I, of course, had another viewpoint.

“This is the smartest thing I have ever done,” I yelled as the sun started to rise and warm the ground under my bike. Maybe I had snapped. Maybe I was crazy, but one thing I knew was that finally, I was free.

Comments

Very interesting. I liked the use of Cyprus as a country as opposed to a type of tree...that caught me off guard in a good way. Nice work. My allowing 400-500 words probably won't challenge you guys much as far as getting all the words in, but I'm learning too.

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That's too funny! I didn't think of Cyprus as a tree until I read your comment. :-P

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haha, I actually had to look up Cyprus because I wasn't sure if it was a city or a country. I never thought of the tree either!
This is just what I shot off after seeing the list. I'm not sure it's the best I could have done, but I like it. lol =)

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Cyprus is an island   Cypress is a tree.    Mimi

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oh, thanks Mimi. =) and welcome to ThinkWrite!

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You're welcome.  You have good ideas.  You really need to tighten your writing,  You should use adverbs where necessary - not adjectives.  With the writing  tightened and a few words corrected, this would be a great little story. Sorry .  I can't get rid of the teacher part of me.  Mimi

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Oh, no that's fine. I am happy to get some constructive criticism.
I have been told in the past that is something I have trouble with. As I said before, this is just something I shot off after seeing the list. Maybe I will edit it and see if I can get it better. Any areas specifically that need work?

Answer 3

OK. Get to work. Right. Where's that assignment paper? Oh, there. OK.

Assignment: Country Profile. Include political situation, history, climate and tourism. Limit 250 words. Due in two weeks.

Two weeks. Right. That would be... tomorrow. OK, so I should have started two weeks ago. Whatever. I'm working now.

... it's stuffy in here. I’ll open the window. Much better. Hey look! They're setting up the fair! I can go with the twins after school tomorrow. Oh, right... school. OK. Here we go...

Cyprus is an island state located in the Mediterranean Sea. It has the unenviable distinction of being strategically located, making it a prime target for Military Intelligence in the area. It gained independence in 1960, but soon animosity between Greek and Turkish Cypriots resulted in

What? Oh, hello Kitty. Did you come for a cuddle? OK, up! Wait, no, NO... NO!! Don't jump on the...

   serseliybloiperpmf[p,,,,[dp

... keyboard. Sigh. Oh, come here, I didn't mean to yell. You're still a good girl. Out you go.

Back to work.

                                                                                 wide spread violence leading to the UN's passage of Resolution 186 which established the United Nations Peacekeeping Force in Cyprus. Further violence in 1974 resulted in the formation of the buffer zone which still exists today. A unique attempt was made in 2005 to bridge the rift using music and art. The film "Cyprus: Echoes Across the Divide" chronicles the event.

Dad called me a pro-cras-tin-ator. I'm not sure what that means, but it sounds rude. He said that’s why I'm in Summer School. Am NOT!! I'm in Summer School because I put off doing assignments until the last minute and I missed deadlines. Dad should apologize.

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Dad wouldn't apologize. He said "Look it up." How rude! Fine.

  Google: procrastinator: define  => Search

Blah, blah, blah... ummm... Oh.  Well.  Never mind.  Where was I? Oh, yes...

Human habitation on the island can be traced back twelve centuries. Although Cyprus has the oldest water wells discovered anywhere, the country currently relies on surface water and desalination plants to provide their needs. Botanists will be drawn by the endemic flora and fauna such as the Cypriot Mouflon.

I’m hungry. OH! Mac&Cheese! Yes!

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Dad says I get distracted too easily.

The climate is mild and pleasant, although periodically the tail end of a sand storm originating in the Sahara deposits a layer of dust over the entire island.

Yawn... what time is it? WHAT?! Where did the time go? Back to work!

The mystery and romance of the island (enhanced by legend - it was the birthplace of Aphrodite) make it an excellent tourist destination. Whether you crave quiet luxury or the adrenaline surge of extreme sports, Cyprus has something for everyone.

I’m SO tired. I'll just lie down for a bit.

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BEEP!  BEEP!  BEEP!  BEEP!

OH!  OH, NO!  It's tomorrow!  How did that happen?!  Oh, well, it's as done as it's going to be. Next time I'll start right away. I will! Really! I will!

Well... maybe...

Comments

It's my life in a story! haha ;)

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Glad I could entertain you! :-) I had fun with this one. Just to add a bit of challenge, I put all ten of the words in the "assignment" inside the story. It was hard to keep within the word limit - there was so much more I wanted to say about Cyprus. It's a beautiful country.

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Ok, hopefully this time it works. Kismet, you are the next one by points so the torch is passed to you. If you do not have the time or the will to post the next ThinkWrite challenge, please say so, so we don't have another long wait in vain.
I see you haven't set any challenges yet, so if you're confused about what to do, please read my comment (the long one) to brokenglasspanda's response. Thanks!
Edit: I hope you don't mind, I decided to leave the other story as the best response, because that's the one 7dutch7 chose and the one with the most points and it should get the credit it deserves. You are still the torchbearer, so go on and make us a fun challenge. :)

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Thank you for the offer, but I'm afraid I won't be around much for a while. I've been very busy at work. I hope you can find someone else to carry the torch. I'll drop by again to see how things are going once things settle down a bit in my world. :-)