ThinkWrite Challenge LVIX

Question

Thank you once again to ladyhwin for choosing my story.  I'll make this quick because people are waiting for me.

The word count must be 208 no more no less, you can feel free to submit stories of a different length but they won't be considered for passing the torch.

Your word list is:

Amuse

Thread

Bold

Wave

Ribbon

Scare

Jump

Keys

Box

Household

 

I will choose who to pass the torch to on Sun Nov 14, that's pretty much the only day I'll have time to really sit down and pick.  So I look forward to seeing your contributions!

Comments

STAYING IN PACE  for other horse lovers



I play the keys like Herbie Hancock's.

I sell my pictures from a cardboard box.

I run my household for my daughter - a fox.

No one scares me out of a jump.



And I ain't goin'down for nothin' but the sun.

And I ain't gonna shake for nothin' but an earthquake.

And I ain't gonna fight for nothin' but the only sight

that takes me where I want to go.



About that ribbon and thread,

the bold accusations are dead.

It amuses me to wave at you

from this side at the zoo.



Which is inside?  Which is out?

I can say without a doubt

outside is a warmer place.

You just have to change your pace,,pace  Pace  PACE  pace.

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This made me think of someone sitting on a porch on an apple box playing the washboard while they sang it.  Did you realize, though, that you put it in as a comment rather than a submission?

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Yeah.  For some reason the reply function wasn't working.  Washboard and washtub bass.  Very funny.  No word count.  I was just having fun.

Answer 1

 

 EPILOGUE

Jeffery left me because of the typewriter.

I found the typewriter at a flea market a few weeks after our second anniversary. I was looking for a way to amuse myself while Jeffery was working long hours at the firm.

This big house seems scarier now that he is gone.

The keys make the most soothing sound as I thread together words into masterpieces. Jeffery hated that sound. It meant I was neglecting the household chores and not making his meals.

This is my last ribbon. Once it runs out I am through.

As I type, the paper rises and curls over the back of the typewriter like a literary wave. I am just a surfer at the mercy of the words. Sometimes I want to jump to safety but I can't.

There is a box of sleeping pills sitting on the counter in the kitchen.

I boldly begged Jeffrey to come back many times. He refused. Once I even told him I would give up the typewriter if he would come back. He still refused. Even now, I am not sure if I was lying or not when I said that. At least I am sure of one thing.

Jeffery will come back for my funeral. 

 

Comments

Had to edit this to death to make it fit the word requirement but it is exactly 208 words including the title. :)

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I liked this one.  The word list flows better in this story.  I especially like the metaphor in the line, "This is my last ribbon.  Once it runs out I am through."  Nice job with this story.

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Nice one, doug's right the word list definitly flows in this one.  Also love how you got the different font that looks like a typewriter font. I didn't even know you could do that!

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I think the text editor is new. Added at the same time as the profile picture option, I believe. Once I saw I could change the font, I couldn't resist. I almost even changed the color of the last couple lines to a lighter gray so it would look like the ink was running low but I think that would have been a bit overboard.

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Brilliant. "Like a literary wave" indeed. And you should consider the edit on the font color. That's brilliant (or faded as the case may be) too.

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Congrats on becoming our next Torch Bearer De!  This was a great story.  Can't wait to see your next word list.

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Great choice Dragon.  It was a very thought provoking story.

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this is probably one of the best stories I've seen in a ThinkWrite challenge so far. It's wonderful!

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Thank you all for your kind words! I am so glad you enjoyed my attempt at the word list. I really had fun with this one.

I will try to get the new challenge sometime tomorrow evening because I cannot wait to read all of your submissions. It really is fun to see how the same words can inspire people in such different and interesting directions.

Thanks again!

Answer 2

“Sing” by Ron

“Amuse me tired dolls.” screamed the little girl, “sing again.”

The dolls did not respond. She thrashed about and one doll was broken, her favorite.

She took care with the needle and thread to repair it. She used ribbon to put a wave in its hair. She held up her work and got a scare. It blinked at her. It made her jump.

She took the keys from her belt and opened the box; the special box.

She extracted her tools. She ran a tight household.

She used the one tool on the repaired doll.

“Sing.” She screamed at it.

The little boy sang to his mother while she held the knife to his throat. He wept while he sang. He watched his little sister slump off the chair.

Comments

Way short of the word count but wanted to take a stab at it (so to speak) anyways. LOL

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Very dark, midnightpoet would be proud.

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Very eerie. You are very talented at eliciting emotion and developing a character with so few words. Well done.

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What mind would dream up something like that? (besides me of course and maybe midnight).  Love it!!!

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that's some wonderfully twisted imagery.

Answer 3

208 words on the nose including title...

 

Simple Simon

American maritime unrehearsed ships escaping.

Tijuana hiring ridiculously eager assess daily.

Butchering old ladies dialogue.

Wishing art vanquishes expressionism.

Robust ingrates bashing, belching on nature.

Sacred crates awash, return (to) Egypt.

Jupiter’s unseen moons perplexing.

Knees (and) eyes, your supplies.

Books on Xerox.

Hastily opened under surreal earthly hazards only located destroyed.

It’s always amusing to try a new technique, be bold and do something that no ones done before. I sometimes scare myself with how brilliant I am, holding the keys to future textbook material. Just as I was about to jump off a bridge because of writers block, a simple letter thread popped into my head and with the assistance of a ten year old we pieced together a ribbon of puzzles. I may not be a household name, but this writing endeavor may be the next wave. Or maybe this would just be another cheap prize in a Cracker Jack box.

Have you caught up yet? Not done yet…

Household boxes still unpacked in the Keystone State

Scared silly by a clown jumping out of a toy.

Ocean waves cutting the shore to ribbons.

Waving at the grim reaper is bold indeed.

I think this thread is done; I hope you were amused. 

Comments

Amused, perhaps.  Confused, perhaps.  I don't really get it but it certainly does make you go back and read it again.

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BTW, love your profile picture.  That cat has such a great look on its face.

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I actually had to reread this a couple times before it clicked. It reminds me of some of those cooking competition shows where a contestant takes the featured ingredient and prepares it three different ways on the same dish. Like duck three ways but instead you did word list three ways.

The first, I adore the concept but the execution seems a bit rushed.
The second, I like how it explains the first while still fitting in the word list.
The third is my favorite. I love the one liners created from the words, the best (in my opinion) being "Waving at the grim reaper is bold indeed"

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Nice. Is that three times each? I'm too lazy to count 'em all.

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Aaaah, had to read one more time, but I do get it now.

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Thanks Dragon, as you probably already know cats use their eyes to communicate much like humans.

Answer 4

“Loose Thread” by Ron

She fussed over her dress. She was getting older she knew but one must always try to at least maintain their appearance. She yanked off a loose thread then patted the hem, straightening it.

She had always loved the spotlight. She was a born performer. She lived to amuse the crowd, to feel the bold rush of excitement at their thunderous applause. She would beam in the footlights and wave at her fans.

Tonight she would dance. She preferred to sing. She was no spring chicken any more. But the number was a dance number so she would dance.

She adjusted the ribbon of her dress until it was just so.

The pianist slammed the keys. It gave her a scare. She hadn’t heard her curtain call. With a flourish and a jump she sprang onto the stage. And she was magnificent. She glided weightlessly over the stage. She jived and wheeled and her gown flowed and it was perfect.

Her eyes sparkled as she bowed to the roaring audience as the footlights faded.

In the darkness her shaking hands pushed the shopping cart with the wobbly wheel to her home; the cardboard box - her household, the one over the grate – by the dumpster – in the alley.

Comments

Wow - I typed this up and did a word count and hit it on the head. I should probably clean it up a bit but it seemed like fate that I hit the mark on the first pass so I'll let it stand.

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Love that feeling when it fits just right (of course I always watch my word count as I'm writing so it's not quite so serendipitous for me).  Don't think it needs cleaning up at all, flows nicely right to the end.

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At a word count of 208 words I think it's hard to put  enough feeling into a story.  I think this is a prime example.  I think it would have been more powerful if you would have had more words to describe the audiences adoration and her feelings more thoughtfully.  I got kind of hung up on the line "She jived and wheeled".  Jived just doesn't seem to flow in the story.  I have no substitutes for you right now, sorry as I am still waking up.

Answer 5

Still lots of time left until Sunday guys.  I'd love to see some more submissions come in.

Comments

working on it, Dragon!  Just have waaay too much stuff to do over this weekend.

Answer 6

The keys were trembling in the ignition from the vibration. My knuckles gripped the wheel so hard I could feel the tendons in my wrist bend like hard fibrous ribbons. My neighbor in the other lane sporting a fedora and driving a Corvette just smirked. Here I was in a beat up old Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme and he had the shiny pristine machine.

The race was to start on asphalt and end in a dry lake bed with a cactus as the finish line. With a wave of an oversized undergarment from one of the spectators, we were off. The vette shot out in front of me, but I soon caught up. Smoke billowed out from all directions as our car tires chewed up pavement and rubber. His vette jumped twice as he smashed the gas pedal to the floor and it was off on yet another getaway, leaving me behind. I felt like I was driving an old wooden box with balloons for tires, but I had had this machine since 1976 and she had never let me down.

Not one to scare easily, I punched the pedal to the floor and the four barrel carburetor kicked in. I was thrown back in my seat as my car took off like a rocket. Nearing my competitor I made a bold move on the hard clay floor and passed him. The finish line was closing in fast and all I could see was a cloud of dust everywhere. I threaded my way through the rocks and reached the finish line…

Household painting really sucks, doesn’t it. I get so bored I have to daydream just to finish the task at hand.

How amusing. 

Comments

Sorry Dragon, I know I missed the 208 word count.  I used to have a 1976 Cutlass Supreme with a 350 four barrel.  It was the best car I ever owned.  It look innocuous enough, but when you punched it, it was gooooooonnnneeeeee!

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I always enjoy a good car tale.

Answer 7

Thinkwrite has censored me. Apparently there is an unspoken wordlist which we cannot use. I had a revelation the other night and set a challenge. It was hidden by "Thinkwrite". This is my last post here. Ever.

Bye.

Have fun with Barney in Romper Room

Comments

Wait, what?

Answer 8

 

I manage all the household finances. We're poor and it's up to me to figure out how to be able to pay bills and still have food to eat. My roommate put it all on my shoulders because I know how to budget.

It doesn't scare me when I look at our monthly income and realize that after paying bills we barely have enough left over for food, but it isn't amusing either.

I have less than a dozen outfits in my closet, half of them thread-bare, and no money to buy more. I can't even afford ribbons to sew onto my clothes to patch the holes.

I know that when I'm done school my income will jump and I won't have to struggle, so every time the worry comes, I put it in a box and lock it away.

I'm holding the keys for a future where I'm not wondering if I'll be able to eat.

I think it's a bold statement to say “money won't buy happiness”, because the security that comes with having disposable income will make me happier.

I'm not unhappy. I'm riding the waves that come with low income and keeping my head above water, and I stay happy because it's temporary.

Comments

This is true, and maybe an over-share, but it's where the word list took me, and it is 208 on the nose.

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Maybe money can't buy happiness but it sure can rent it.  I liked this story, had a feeling it was true as I was reading it.

Answer 9

 

Well, my demands have been increased. I can't help it.

I now want us to unite our households. 

You claim that I jump the track and all I do 

- by crying and yelling - is to open Pandora's box. 

Yet, if I ask for your house's keys, it's only because 

I need a thread to connect with your life. 

Let me in, I beg you! Let me in and I'll amuse you 

tying ribbons of bright expectations around your bed.

My love for you rises as a big uncontrolled wave.

Face it boldly and don't get scared.

Let it come onto you and please, baby, please!

Please, don't run away!

Comments

Nice.  i  read  an article today called  'Catch the Happiness Virus'.  The gist was that happiness is contageous - just like a flu virus.  Your piece reminded me of that.

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Aaah, the desire to move forward in a relationship, this can be so hard when the other person isn't on the same page as you.  Good submission.

Answer 10

Last day for submissions, there's still time to get something in.  I'll wait until closer to the end of the day to pick my favorite so if anyone's still got something they're working on you've still got time.