Humor - Make Me Laugh

Question

It's not that easy...

Comments

now THIS is a challenge. It's so much easier to make someone cry than to make them laugh. I know, I enjoy making people cry.

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It's a shame that Ron has disappeared on us again.  We do so want to make you laugh kind sir.

Answer 1

Random thoughts…

It is said that life is a box of chocolates.  I hate chocolate.

Hitler was Reich.

Why are there Jewish community centers, Latino community centers, African American community centers, but no “white” community centers?

Jesus was married.  The bible just said it was a cross that was a burden on his back.

There are three branches in the United States government,  the left, the right and the rest of us who pay taxes to support them.

Offshore oil drilling is safe.  Ask the ocean’s residents.

Christopher Columbus discovered America.  The Indians were secret passengers hidden away on his ships?

Answer 2

A very elderly lady was having her yearly check up.  The doctor said to her "You're looking very healthy, now tell me, do you still have intercourse?"
She said "Hold on, I'll ask my husband."  
So she leans out of the exam room and shouts across the waiting room  "Harold! Do we still have intercourse!?"
The room went silent.
He responded "No Ethel, we switched to Blue Cross."

Comments

Good one Dragon!

Answer 3

Sorry - not even a chuckle

Answer 4

But let's try this:

Little Johnny

So little Johnny comes home from school one day. He has a big grin on his face.

His Mom asks him why he's smiling and Little Johnny says - "Well Mom - today in school I learned to fuck!"

(If you're already offended you should really, really stop reading now - it will get worse - I promise.)

Mom is disgusted and sends Little Johnny to his room. "Wait until your father comes home little boy!" she says as he marches up to his room.

Later. Dad comes home. Mom meets him at the door.

"I want you to talk to your son." she says "Ask him what he learned in school today!"

So Dad goes upstair and opens Johnny's door. There is little Johnny - laid back, arms behind his head with a big shit-eating grin on his face.

Dad asks "Johnny. Why is your Mom so angry? What did you learn in school today?"

Johnny smiles and says "Well Dad - today in school I learned to fuck!"

Dad was estatic. He pumped his fist in the air and says "Yeah - my son is a man! I don't care what your mother says - I'm taking you out tonight."

So against Mom's objections Dad takes little Johnny down to the local watering hole.

He throws open the doors and there's a room full of drunk men.

"Hey fellas" he shouts, "This is my son Johnny"

"Hey kid" and "Sup dude" follow.

Dad beems at Johnny - "Tell them what you learned in school today Johnny."

Johnny gleems and says "Well fellas - today in school I leanred to fuck."

Well the guys went wild - the screamed and they cheered. One guy yelled out "Johnny did you like it?"

Johnny said "Yeah. Sure."

And another bloke yelled "Hey Johnny. Are you gonna fuck again tomorrow?

Johnny looked at the crowd and said "No. I'm gonna wait til my ass stops hurting."

Bah dum-dum!

Comments

potty mouthed humor, how quaint and so not funny, well maybe a "tad".

Answer 5

Cheese                                                                              Okay people i bet everybody on thinkwrites loves cheese! Well i love cheese! And i made a song about cheese wanna hear it? okay here it goes.  Ohhhhh Ohhhhh Ohhhh Ohhhh I LUV CHEESE! I LUV CHEESE! I LUV CHEESE! I LUV CHEESE! You can use cheese on a pizza please or you can use it with pepperoni. Maybe toco or a bigmac. But cheese that is plain is a really good snack!!! I LUV CHEESE! I LUV CHEESE! I LUV CHEESE! I LUV CHEESE!    Now how was that? Hope it made you laugh. Cause i really love cheese and if you dont like it you make me cry man!!!!!!!!!!! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Comments

I think I can safely answer for Ron...not funny in the least.  Yay!